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  • Writer's pictureMakenzie Finks


A co-worker of mine asked me out for coffee the other day. She said she wanted to spend more time actually getting to know the people in the office on a deeper level. We have been working together for a semester now but I somehow agree with her that we were all just co-existing in the office rather than engaging with one another. How cool is that, that she asked to get to know me more personally? It's so amazing when you meet people that have this desireto really devote quality time to other people. 

I mean, it came at no surprise because this is a woman who is so in touch with herself and with others. She can read people and she truly cares. She listens and and gives advice. I have admired her from afar basically that whole first semester because of her poise and calming naturethat she gives off. So, as you can probably tell I was super pumped to get to talk with her on a deeper level. 

Talking on deep and complex levels is my jam; or at least it used to be. I used to satisfy this need from my dear friend Haley at my undergraduate university. We talked about love, God, spiritual needs, and how to just live beautifully. It was an incredible outlet and that connection you get when talking to people about things like this in indescribable. Coming to my graduate school I kind of lost that part of me. Not even the part about talking about complex thoughts but just talking in an open and transparent manner. I felt trapped and lonely upon coming here. I've been working on it, but when my co-worker asked me to talk that day I don't think she realized that she gave me the push I needed. 

I poured my heart out to her in that mere 45 minutes and it felt great. Releasing some aching thoughts as well as learning more about self care. This is something that she is an avid believer in and she always makes sure to pencil in time for herself because she knows she deserves it and she knows just how important it is in order for her to live a happy life. What's even cooler is she tries to make sure others are allotting themselves the time as well andshe's open to talking about what exactly self care is and how to achieve it for you. 

I know I know.. you're thinking, "Wow, I want to be this person's friend. She's so supportive." And you're so right! 

Anyways, we discussed on that day what we thought self care was and what it was not. It is sometimes that topic that gets thrown around where people always say "self care, self care, self care" and you get it but you don't know how to actually do it? Yeah that was me. 

And guys I'm here to tell you that... self care is basically everything. I might have been a little iffy on knowing what to do for myself before that day. I would have said it was something that was emotionally stimulating your or making you grow. But walking away from that conversation, I realized that anythingI intentionally do to love myself or take care of myself IS SELF CARE.

It's not this foreign concept. You don't have to be worried you aren't doing right. Because truth is, you're already doing it! What's important is just making sure that you do it everyday because you're a gosh dang QUEEN and you deserve to be told that and you deserve to be loved. You deserve to give yourself a break and to laugh a little. You deserve to be happy! 

That's it. The end. No questions asked. 

So I thought I would compile a small list of things I do for self care and I'm sure you already do some of these things but just in case you didn't know you were or wanted reassurance then this is the post for you. 

1. Get at least 8 hours of sleep 

2. Wash Face

3. Exercise

4. Paint Nails

5. Stretch 

6. Meditation 

7. Journal

8. Eat Healthy Food 

9. Clean the shower you've been wanting to do for weeks

10. Read a book

11. Watch a movie

12. Take a Bath

13. Get Coffee

14. Bake

15. Go to the lake

16. Make a gratitude list

17. Listen to music

18. Eat Chocolate

19. Stay in your PJ's all day

20. Write down 5 things you like about yourself

So you see, self care is everyday things you do that tells yourself you care about your body - mentally, physically, and emotionally.But one thing that is important to remember is to take time to rest. You don't have to do all of these things all of the time. If you're goal for self care is running a mile everyday but you skip it one day or can't quite make it, that's okay. You still did self care. You still loved yourself. What isn't self care is if after you only ran that half mile you look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are terrible because you didn't run a mile. 

NO. You are strong and kick ass for getting out of your house that day and running at all. You let your body know you love it. Always remember that it is okay to take a day to rest, and that that is self care too. Doing what your body needs is self care.

Don't you feel better knowing that you already had all of the right tools in place to love yourself?! I know I did. I am thankful for the conversation that day, for my coworker for reaching out, and for myself knowing that I deserve to give my self some time to love myself.

I hope you have a successful week full of love, happiness, and motivation.


xo- Kenzie 

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